Last edited by Renard99; 25th October at 9: It would seem that after a break up most people go on to date others. Why should you tell him you are dating someone new. It was inevitable that you would and so will he. I wouldn't attend his party if I were you, but I would take my date without reservation to other friends parties. Because you still see each other at social gatherings and have some of the same friends and espeically because you have been invoted to his home for a party you may go to Its not as though you dont see him and arent speaking.
It would be odd if you accepted an invitation to his house and brought a date without telling him first. Originally Posted by 2sure. Originally Posted by simpsonic. You don't need to tell him When my one love She blew up my phone with like 30 text messages, started writing all these messages on facebook, called and cried and cried. I was having a field day, the bitc4 haha. So I just put her ringtone to that justin timeberlake song, what comes around goes around.
It was a pretty high moment listening to that song. Let me paint this picture for you, baby You spend your nights alone And he never comes home And every time you call him All you get's a busy tone I heard you found out That he's doing to you What you did to me Ain't that the way it goes When you cheated girl My heart bleeded girl So it goes without saying that you left me feeling hurt Just a classic case A scenario Tale as old as time Girl you got what you deserved.
I've decided that I will not go to my ex's party. Maybe that's something to bring up with a mutual friend who is in contact with him more often.
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Oh, and to add to that, in the end it was definitely a net positive for our friendship that I did tell him. It's none of his business. He has no right to know. You have no need to tell him. Yup, on a need to know basis - he doesn't need to know. He probably doesn't want to, either. I'm not saying that this is your motivation, but just trying to make you aware that this is often a factor and you should make sure it isn't the one driving you.
Also, even if you don't intend it this way, this may be how he perceives it, so you could be hurting him even if you really are trying to help him. Further, does he even want to know? Maybe he's just getting over you-- hence the working long hours-- and you calling to tell him you've found somebody else will just hammer home the finality of it all to him and make him feel worse.
Should You Tell Your Ex You're Dating Again?
Do you honestly want to tell him because you think he would be hurt by it? Obviously, none of us know his personality and if you truly care about him and actually think that he would be less-hurt to find out about it from you, then I could see why you might want to tell him. Basically, I'm saying that there are about a million ways it could be a bad idea and only one tiny one where it could be good. My magic 8-ball is giving pretty clear indications here Why do you think this would hurt him? And how might the new guy feel about the ex having such status that you have to inform ex?
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You do not have any such responsibilities to your ex. If i were in new guy's place, if you told ex for any reason other than it came up in a friendly conversation, I would be keeping an eye out for signs that you were using me to get over ex or to make ex jealous, or that you and ex had some kind of codependency drama.
Any other signs of any of those, and I'd be out. Just live your own life. You are a year or two away from the place where you and ex are just friends. I wouldn't tell him. Somehow to me this feels like you're still not quite over your ex, in a way. Or even if you are, I feel that it could give him that impression on some level. If you know that you're both going to the same party, that's one thing.
If you think that you might just happen to run into him at a bar, that's different I'm going to go against the grain and say And I'm bringing my own baggage to it where my last two exes were people I'd known as friends for years and hoped to continue being friends with afterwards. Like darksong mentioned, if you broke up a fairly short time ago, I would in your ex's situation appreciate a heads-up that this is a new-thing they might hear about or see on FB and there wasn't any overlap.
I'd rather hear it from you with that footnote than simply wake up to couple-photos or a relationship status-change on Facebook if you're still friends there and wonder. If it was such a long time ago that the question of overlap wouldn't enter my head, then I'd just leave it alone. Up until the point where you know for sure you're you're going to be in the same social scenario where it might come as a shock to them to see you with someone else IF you've been keeping your new relationship low-key on FB and generally.
Then a little "hey, I'm looking forward to seeing you again, not everyone knows but I am seeing someone new I hope it won't be awkward but I understand if it is" mssg is ok. And that's assuming you want to stay real friends with your ex, not just amicable acquaintances. If it's been awhile such that you seeing someone new shouldn't be a real shock , if you're not planning to be real friends but just amicable exes and do the slow-fade By the time he bumps into you and your new bf he'll already know and have adjusted.
If someone I hadn't dated for four years felt the need to break it to me softly that he was dating someone new, I'd wonder if I should be insulted that he thought I was so fragile, or if he was still hung up on me.
Yeah, maybe let me know. Just to be clear, the OP has dated the person for four years, they broke up earlier this year, which isn't super clear how long, but at most the break-up was in January. I agree that with the idea that this isn't a necessary heads-up, but would be fine to do. I, too, thought the best test was for the OP to rely on their gut reaction to what they would want if the situation was reversed, with the caveat that they should consider if the ex-boyfriend would truly want a heads-up. No, don't reach out and break your minimal contact to tell him this. Then you can send a short friendly text, "Hey!
If he eats his heart out as a result, it's not your problem. He doesn't own you. I think you should just tell him.go to link
Should I tell my ex I'm seeing someone else? - alatstorrime.cf Community Forums
Will he be hurt? More than likely, however, over the course of the year that you two were together you broke up 6 times! That's a lot, and that to me shows that you two aren't right for each other. Good relationships have problems, but breaking up 6 times is a huge red flag. I'm sure he loves you your ex , but you deserve a stable relationship-and so does he.
You two just were not working out. And rather than drag it on for another year of break-ups and reunions, give it a rest and move on. Just tell him that you honestly are seeing someone else. That you feel you two aren't right for each other since the relationship was so up and down. He might get angry, but honestly it's for the better. Why do you need to tell your ex?
I mean he is your ex for a reason and so it's not really any of his business if you are seeing someone new. He is your ex. Let him be that and forget about him.
He doesn't need to know that you met someone new. There's no reason to tell him unless you plan to be with him again in the future. Just focus on that new person and tell your ex to back off. Why are you still talking to him the first place? That just makes him think you want him even it's just a little. You really need to cut him out of your life.
Tell your sister to stop talking to him and block his number. You obviously had an unhealthy relationship so why would you want him in your life anyway? If he has broken up with you 6 times I believe that he can do it more. Just tell him the truth. If you really like the other guy now take the risk and move on since first of all you promised your ex that you would be honest with him. Also, I think that it's best for him to take the pain once you've told him rather hang onto you. Yes, being honest with him may tear him apart but that's reality.
He has to face that and both of you must move on. Anyways, good luck on the new relationship and I hope I made sense. Tell my ex I'm seeing someone new?